Mock the Auto-Announcer game
- Thread starter Wessex_Electric_Nutter
- Start date
Glenethson
Some Might Say
The train now arriving on platforms 3, 4 and 5 has been blown up.
Wessex_Electric_Nutter
New member
Attention passengers on platform 5, Please do not touch the train standing at platform 5 as you are likely to get an electric shock. Don't beleive me? Try it yourself.
*Ding Dong* Ladies and Gentlemen,
This is a CrossCountry service to Penzance. Calling at; Stafford, Wolverhampton, Birmingham New Street, Birmingham International, Coventy, Bristol Parkway, Bristol Temple Meads, Plymouth and Penzance. Anyone who read our timetable and wanted to get off at and station that I haven't said is in no luck as I cant be bothered to stop anywhere else.
This is a CrossCountry service to Penzance. Calling at; Stafford, Wolverhampton, Birmingham New Street, Birmingham International, Coventy, Bristol Parkway, Bristol Temple Meads, Plymouth and Penzance. Anyone who read our timetable and wanted to get off at and station that I haven't said is in no luck as I cant be bothered to stop anywhere else.
Ding Dong: Warning we have seen a terrorist. Hes standing at the end of platform 5. Hes wearing an anorak, a bobble hat and a pair of thick rimmed glasses. He is holding a notepad for writing down the details of trains so he can blow them up. There could be a bomb inside his camara.
NSWGR_46Class
Just call my Captain Rude
ok this we have in sydney australia
these are sound bites of the local ones - yes they are posted on youtube but voice announcements.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKuLQaZYb9U
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDqIU7ybgkY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kdaFjyA19jE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZMiH8eNX3k
these are sound bites of the local ones - yes they are posted on youtube but voice announcements.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKuLQaZYb9U
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDqIU7ybgkY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kdaFjyA19jE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZMiH8eNX3k
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Attention all passengers, due to a new health and safety law you are all now required to wear suits made of bubble wrap and not the small bubble wrap that the apples in Tesco are packed in but the proper industrial stuff. The stuff with the 1m diameter bubbles.
Also please note that the new round doors equipped on all trains are 99cm diameter.
Good Luck!
Also please note that the new round doors equipped on all trains are 99cm diameter.
Good Luck!
valley train?
Announcment on an atw valley train,
"Welcome aboard ladies and gentlemen, this is the 1835 out of cardiff central to Ebbw vale parkway. This train will be calling at Rogerstone, Risca and Pontymister, Crosskeys, Abercarn, Newbridge, Crumlin, Llanhilleth and Ebbw vale parkway. Passengers for Abercarn and Crumlin are to be aware of the gap between the train and line side as both stations and platforms at these station were demolished in 1962."
Announcment on an atw valley train,
"Welcome aboard ladies and gentlemen, this is the 1835 out of cardiff central to Ebbw vale parkway. This train will be calling at Rogerstone, Risca and Pontymister, Crosskeys, Abercarn, Newbridge, Crumlin, Llanhilleth and Ebbw vale parkway. Passengers for Abercarn and Crumlin are to be aware of the gap between the train and line side as both stations and platforms at these station were demolished in 1962."
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*ding Dong* the train going to london, mosco, new york, and seattle, will now be ariving on track (platform) 12. please be careful as there there are 99999999 continuis tgv trains and we want you to be run over by them.
5 minutes later
*ding ding ding ding ding dong* The train to london, mosco, new york and seattle has been cancelled due to there being toilets and food on the train and not that there is no way to cross the ocean. WE HOPE YOU HAVE HAD A HORIBBLE DAY AND THAT THIS HAS MADE IT WORSE. good day.
5 minutes later
*ding ding ding ding ding dong* The train to london, mosco, new york and seattle has been cancelled due to there being toilets and food on the train and not that there is no way to cross the ocean. WE HOPE YOU HAVE HAD A HORIBBLE DAY AND THAT THIS HAS MADE IT WORSE. good day.
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Ding Dong... This is your train manager speaking, will all passengers please be aware that this train terminates at the next station.
Would all passengers please make sure they have all their belongings with them when departing the train,
This includes old age pensioners and children, as they are very hard to sell on EBay
Would all passengers please make sure they have all their belongings with them when departing the train,
This includes old age pensioners and children, as they are very hard to sell on EBay
continuation from my last post,
Sorry for the delay ladies and gentlemen, but the signaller has forgotten to switch the points for the ebbw vale line and we are now heading towards Machen. We are also sorry to announce that we have run out of fuel. A replacement coach has been dispatched for the rest of the journey but is not due to arrive for one month due to lack of drivers at the local stagecoach depot.
If you don't wish to wait one month for our replacement coach, please board the stone train which will be due in 3 days time and will stop at newport only.
Sorry for the delay ladies and gentlemen, but the signaller has forgotten to switch the points for the ebbw vale line and we are now heading towards Machen. We are also sorry to announce that we have run out of fuel. A replacement coach has been dispatched for the rest of the journey but is not due to arrive for one month due to lack of drivers at the local stagecoach depot.
If you don't wish to wait one month for our replacement coach, please board the stone train which will be due in 3 days time and will stop at newport only.
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Wessex_Electric_Nutter
New member
May we have your attention please. This announcement will be followed by a series of random farm animals sound effects for your convenience, we thank you for travelling to West Sussex and hope you enjoy your stay.