Train Announcements.


New member
Having taken three long rail journeys this week (six including returns journeys), the one thing that any passenger travelling on the British rail network cannot fail to notice is the almost constant on-board audio announcements they are subject to as they travel these days . I can accept the necessity for passengers joining a train at any station are informed of the emergency procedure should anything happen, and that passengers preparing to leave the train on approach to a station are reminded to take their belongings with them on leaving.

However, along with the above announcements there is also a “constant barrage” of the irreverent information often which would seem to be obvious to most people. One announcement I was subject to informed me that the toilets in coach E had been taken out of service and therefore would passengers in that coach please use the toilets in coaches F or D. As I was sitting in coach E, I along with everyone else had already noticed the prominent electric sign stating “toilets out of service”. As no one ever uses the “rail mounted public convenience” unless they absolutely have to, where else did the train manager think we were going to go, out the window.

Another announcement we had while travelling up to London was “this is your train manager speaking, there is severe congestion on the M4 motorway on approach to Reading”. Did it not occur to the train manager that the reason why the vast majority of us on that train were travelling by rail was to avoid travelling on the M4 motorway in the first place.

On another day we were informed by the driver that the train was running under a speed restriction due to “platform congestion at Crewe station” whatever that was suppose to mean . It had not seemingly occurred to driver that any passenger glancing out the window would realise the train was not doing its normal speed and anyone with a forward facing seat could see the amber signals flashing past. Along with the foregoing every few minutes you receive announcements that hot snacks, coffee, papers, alcoholic drinks and magazines are available from the buffet car or trolley service whichever is to be had and of coarse on weekday HST services a real treat, weather forecasts for the next town or city the train will stop at.

At the end of any journey as you leave the train you cannot help but feel that the train manager, driver and anyone else who can get near the microphone must love the sound of their own voice. So, what do trainzers feel they would like to hear or not to hear while travelling on a rail journey. I realise that many forum members do not have passenger rail in their state or country, so just imagine a journey between two states or cities if a railway does not exist and tell us what you think you would like to hear or not to hear on-board.

Could be interesting for us all :)
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There was a thread on this very subject over on the RailUK forum. My contribution to that was the station announcer at Edinburgh Haymarket during a period of heavy snow (I say heavy, for those of us over 40, it was a dusting). Having completed a brewery tour, a few of us were waiting for a train back to Stirling. All the services between Glasgow and Edinburgh were running but everything else was delayed. After announcing several delays over the space of half an hour, the announcer said "I regret to inform passengers that the xx:xx to Kirkcaldy has been delayed." There was a pause, then he continued, "to be honest, this is the biggest pantomime since Snow White." There was much laughter on the platforms given how annoyed everyone was.
Over here we have the complete opposite on intercity trains; a woeful lack of useful announcements.

Yes, you'll be told when your train is departing. No, you won't be told why it's departing two hours late, what the next station is, why you've stopped for no apparent reason in the middle of nowhere, or why the train is ambling along at 30kmh.
A good friend of mine recorded some sound on his phone of a Queensland Rail service's on-train auto-announcer sounding as if it were drunk. I'll see if he can upload the sound somewhere for everyone to enjoy. It's hilarious! :D

Here, the problem on most transportation systems are announcements that are so badly muffled that they can't even be made out. If one could even tell what was being announced, at least they *might* not be so bad.