"I don't know what the world is coming to. These new whippersnappers are just so soft. I mean, what's wrong with a hand car? Rarely breaks down, and when it does, it's easy to fix. In my day, we'd think nothing of pumping uphill 10 miles to the job site, and then when we were done, pumping 10 miles back up hill to the maintenance base. But with our speeder broken having a broken crankshaft again, when I suggested replacing it with a hand car you'd have thought I was suggesting getting the crew chartreuse hard hats, or something. Can you imagine any real railroader so soft as to need "air conditioning"? Well, in my day, if we wanted more air conditioning, we just pumped faster, and turned the 2/10 "air conditioner" into a 2/20. And we didn't need no fancy gym membership, either.
"But the General Manager says to check out something called a "hi-rail truck"; says they come in different configurations from a pick up, all the way through a device big enough to rerail a car, but searching the normal supply sources,, I cant find any sense that these even exist. But the member of the section gang who seems to know a place he always gets fish, has promised to let me in on his secret if I can find such a vehicle. But where do I look?"
G. Andy Dancer,
Maintenance Superintendant.
